Get on the ground and roll around. Do the potato dance.
It’s amazing what boredom will make you do. Out of desperation we decided to attempt to add excitement and wonder to our rather dull day by driving to the enchanting Gem state. For those of you who do not know, or can not read the title, that is Idaho. ID. Land of potatoes. Thus the opening song that one of us, who would like to remain anonymous, made up during the fascinating and extremely scenic drive from Logan to Preston.
But wait, that’s not all. If you order today we will throw in a real family heirloom, a genuine square of toilet paper (unused) from THE Stokes Market in Preston ID. We will also slash the price by 1 payment, making this extremely affordable keepsake yours today for only . . .
Arriving in Preston, we did the only thing logical to do in Preston: search for Napoleon Dynamite sites. However, since this trip was severely spontaneous and derived from sheer desperation to salvage an already dismal day celebration, we were lacking A) A map/list of sites, B) a camera, and C) our minds (what WERE we thinking anyway?).
We did, however, after a frantic call to free directory assistance, find the DI. In it’s temporary location due to remodeling. No dance groove videos or sweet suits. They didn’t even have used tots. We also went to Kings, where they do NOT carry 24 packs of markers. Or 12 packs either. They really mix and match these days with the economic crisis. Only 10 packs for Prestonians.
And, yes, we went to the bathroom in the one grocery store we could find. No, no movie significance that we know of, but, hey, I’m pregnant and picky and it’s the nicest looking building in Preston. And it was my birthday. Apparently.
We also saw a suicidal cow just south of Richmond, UT. It appeared to be precariously atop a billboard that was smaller than the actual cow. Reports from the engineer in the family indicated that the structure was not designed to support such a load. Yeah, we’re talking about you, Betsy. They weren’t kidding when they said happy cows come from California.