The last days have come. Jesus has reappeared! And there was an apparent misunderstanding. It seems that the great melting of the world will actually take place at room temperature (the change probably had something to do with the sudden onset of global warming).
The righteous shall be as chocolate sauce, nuts, and a cherry. All are invited to come, and partake of his righteousness! (just don’t take too much – there are only three gallons of His Righteousness to share)
There are 31 flavors to choose from. But only one shall bring salvation.
The wicked, who waffle as a cone, shall suffer from sudden headaches if they eat too fast.
For the Lord has returned again to the earth! Proclaim his salvation! Store Him and His Word safely below 30 degrees Fahrenheit!
For the Lord Almighty has returned again to the earth! He hath come suddenly, as a dairy delivery in the night, with great flavor and creamy consistency.