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Posts Tagged ‘Social Norms’

  1. Five Dollar Date

    January 14, 2017 by Ryan

    What exactly is the big deal?

    In Adult Roles and Financial Literacy class at Highland High School in Salt Lake City, the teacher handed out an assignment. The boys received a blue paper, while the girls received a pink paper.

    Maybe the color of the paper offended people?

    The instructions began, “Your assignment is to go on a date! But, the catch is you can only spend $5.00, this does not include gas.” Perhaps the point of offensive was taken here, as a run-on sentence beginning with “But!” should make every English student cringe!

    “Below is a list of suggestions from the girls.” From what group of girls? Where they polled from a previous class? As I read the suggestions, it would seem that they were taken from a survey of other students, though I’d like clarity on this source.

    The instructions encourage that the assignment may completed as a group date, pooling money for the activity.

    I’ve taken up the blue subtitled “Boys Paper” (which I feel link should contain an apostrophe) to analyze:


    • Make plans for the date and let the girl know what they are doing
    • Have creative ideas for dates.
    • Use good manners:
      • table manners
      • chew with mouth closed
      • open doors for her
      • introduce her to your friends
      • no gross noises
    • Don’t gripe about the money you’re spending or don’t have.
    • Don’t spend too much time talking about things she isn’t interested in or about yourself.
    • Don’t exaggerate to your friends about what happened on the date.
    • Dress for the occasion, like you care about her:
      • appropriate clothes
      • clean
      • a little nice cologne
      • nice breath
    • Be prepared for the date (car gassed and ready to go)
    • Be on time (or call if you can’t be on time)
    • Give compliments when they are sincere.
    • Don’t feel entitled to a kiss (or more).
    • At a restaurant, say what you’re going to order so she will have a guide in ordering.
    • Don’t comment or be concerned with how much she is or isn’t eating.
    • Be honest.
    • Don’t use vulgar language or swear.
    • It’s okay to show your feelings.
    • Look out for her well being on a date, be considerate.
    • Don’t talk about, flirt with, text or check out other girls when on a date.
    • Have a sense of humor, have a good time.
    • Keep up your end of the conversation, listen and respond.
    • Girls like flowers and little gifts.
    • Be respectful to her parents.
    • Have her home on time.
    • Don’t drive recklessly.
    • Show respect to her.

    The bottom of the page gives three blank lines where the student was to summarize the “date activities,” and concluded with a signature line for the “Date’s Signature.”

    Parents are upset with this?

    The overwhelming complaint I see online is that the suggestions are “from the 1960s,” “sexist,” or “inappropriate.”

    What is the name of that class again? Adult Roles. Then this, in context with a lesson about social norms, is a fantastic assignment. Go out into the world, and practice interaction with another human being in a social setting. Show interest in her; show courtesy towards her, and show attentiveness toward her needs.

    The word that comes to mind is “Chivalry.”

    It is an assignment that might last for a couple of hours. They are skills that will serve the individual well in all aspects of life.

    Or would they rather that their boys be encouraged to take a girl out, stare at his phone, swear, thoughtlessly speak about people or topics, and make the girl uncomfortable?

    The page could have been rewritten for grammatical and clarity issues. Other than that, I have no problem with the premise of the assignment. I would encourage this assignment!