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April, 2009

  1. Welcome to G32!

    April 28, 2009 by Ryan

    Dearest Glorajean,

    Surprise and good day!

    G32 is “The Official Community for Glorajean Fans” — the first of its kind in your 32-year history! Here, to celebrate you, have gathered a small sampling of some of the people that have been touched by your goodness.

    I’ll start off with myself.

    I am ever awed to contemplate the fortune it was of mine, when I think of the course of my life that eventually led us to cross paths. One prompting in particular led me to enroll in college, which lead me to be introduced to people that I otherwise would not have become aquatinted, and eventually those associations brought me to you, for which I will be eternally indebted and grateful.

    I want you to know that you are the missing puzzle piece that completes me. I cherish you every day!

    I love you. For your birthday and for always.


  2. A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Office…

    April 27, 2009 by Ryan

    This evening (around 9:30 pm), Glorajean needed to pick up a few papers at her office. So we drove by together for her to stop in.

    Our conversation as we approached was about the increase of traffic in the area, especially since the bank next door, with whom they share a drive way, just acquired another failing bank’s customers and assets.

    We entered the driveway to see a minivan parked in the front “visitor parking” area. The van’s lights were on, and engine appeared to still be running. The driver’s door was open, and an older woman stood, bent down, appearing to scoop dirt from their front yard into a plastic bucket.

    We thought that a bit odd, and proceeded around to the back. There was one other car in the parking lot, and approximately every light in the building was on. We retrieved what we needed, and turned off excess lights along the way out.

    As we left, we noted that the same car was still there, and just then another car entered the back parking area. This car did not turn toward the regular parking area, but proceeded all the way to the back, pulling up next to the dumster as though they intended to dispose of some refuse.

    We continued on our way. By then the old lady had apparently collected all the dirt she wanted, as she was gone.

    Apparently it is becoming a full-service kind of accounting firm.


  3. Something to think about

    April 22, 2009 by Ryan

    “A good man, out of the good treasure of his heart, bringeth forth that which is good.” (Jesus, quoted by Luke; punctuation modernized)


  4. Everybody hum along, O.K.?

    April 20, 2009 by Ryan

    If I had a Hummer

    I’d Hummer in the morning

    I’d Hummer in the evening

    All over this land

    I’d Hummer out danger

    I’d Hummer out a warning

    I’d Hummer out love between my brothers and my sisters

    All over this land


  5. Exploring new features on facebook

    April 13, 2009 by Ryan

    Ryan… has just activated the new feature “facebook esp”
    About an hour ago

    Ryan… wonders how cool is that? Just think it and it goes on facebook! Whoa! What will they come up with next?
    About 59 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… can’t find his USB drive. I know I put it here on my nightstand.
    About 57 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… would be thinking bad words now (if he knew any), because he still can’t find his USB drive. Why does everything I’m looking for always seem to wander off around here?
    About 56 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… found his usb drive. It was in his pocket with his keys and cell phone. Opps.
    About 55 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…is thinking about eating toast made out of multi-grain wide-loaf bread.
    About 53 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.
    One friend likes this

    Ryan… put the bread in the toaster. This wide-loaf bread doesn’t fit very well.
    About 52 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…adjusted the toaster to medium and pressed down the lever.
    About 52 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…thinks, yum, that will be good with butter.
    About 50 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.
    Two friends like this

    Ryan…noticed that he is out of butter. Margarine will have to do.
    About 51 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… decided that while he has the bread out, he will make a sandwich for his lunch today.
    About 50 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… thinks that he will cut the cheese for his sandwich.
    About 49 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… just realized that he put “cut the cheese” on his facebook status.
    About 48 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.
    Three friends like this!

    Ryan… wonders if he should consider getting different friends.
    About 48 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… wonders if any of the famous Osmond family have to make their own sandwiches for lunch.
    About 47 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… can’t find a sharp knife to “slice” the cheese with.
    About 46 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… thought he would try using a butter knife that was handy.
    About 46 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… noted that the butter knife didn’t work so well.
    About 46 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… placed the chunks of cheese on his sandwich.
    About 45 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… picks out the “lite mayo” – but we already had this discussion, didn’t we?
    About 45 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.
    Link: http://www.glorajean.com/content/?p=514

    Ryan… fishes some pickles out of the jar.
    About 44 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… realized that the toast popped up some time ago.
    About 43 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… saw that the toast came completely out of the toaster and landed to the side. It must have got some good air when it came out of the toaster! Nice spring action!
    About 42 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… is ready to put the sandwich together. But the uneven cheese chunks are making this sandwich look lopsided.
    About 41 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  is trying to fit the sandwich, made with uneven sliced cheese and wide-loaf multi-grain bread, into a standard size sandwich baggy.
    About 40 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… smashed the sandwich into the baggy, but the pickles fell out and are laying separately in the bag.
    About 39 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… will just deal with those at lunchtime, as he now puts the sandwich into his cooler.
    About 38 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… adds some easter candy to his lunch cooler.
    About 37 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.
    1 friend likes this.

    Ryan… has the toast “buttered” with margarine.
    About 36 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… is thinking about what to eat for breakfast now. How about frosted mini-wheats to go with the toast?
    About 34 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… poured the cereal. He emptied the box.
    About 33 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… almost put the empty box into the recycling, but remember that it has a token on the back to cut out. Send in 8 tokens and $8.99 shipping and handling and you get a free disposable camera, in one of two designs based on Disney characters.
    About 32 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… poured the milk and offered a prayer of thanks.
    About 31 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… is eating his cereal and toast.
    About 30 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… wonders if it would be possible to crack open the “disposable” camera, to replace the film and reuse the camera?
    About 28 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… is thinking that the camera might not be a great deal. The film will need developing and that will cost additional money.
    About 28 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… thinks how spoiled we are with digital cameras.
    About 27 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… wonders if using a disposable camera is wasteful to the environment?
    About 26 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… remembered reading a promise by Disney that in a few years, they will go completely “zero waste” in their theme parks. Can they really do that?
    About 25 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… wonders if he thinks it, will facebook esp find the news release on that and post it automatically?
    About 25 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.
    Link: http://corporate.disney.go.com/news/corporate/2009/2009_0309_cr_release.html

    Ryan… noticed that it is time to leave for work.
    About  24 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  went upstairs to kiss his wife goodbye. She is awesome!
    About  23 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  can’t find his shoes now.
    About  22 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  is still hunting for his shoes. Why does everything I am looking for seem to wander off around here!
    About 21 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  found his shoes, in the kitchen where he took them off and placed them to dry after coming in from the rain the other night.
    About  20 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… is outside, searching for his newspaper now.
    About  19 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… found his newspaper underneath the car.
    About  18 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  got up from the driveway after nearly climbing under the car to retrieve the newspaper.
    About  17 minutes ago  * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… is driving away, but thinking that it might be easier if the newspaper delivery guy would just put it on or near the porch.
    About  17 minutes ago  * Updated via facebook esp.
    Link: http://www.glorajean.com/content/?p=53

    Ryan…  is wondering what my facebook page must look like by now?
    About  16 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.
    8 Friends commented on this.

    Ryan…  is waiting at a dumb traffic light that is red for a bunch of cars, but green for a small residential cross street that has no traffic at all in sight.
    About  15 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  is getting tired of waiting, because the traffic light just turned green for the other side, but is still red for my direction. It gave a turn signal to the other direction, but there are no cars in the turn lane.
    About 14 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… might use bad words right now, if he knew any.
    About 14 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  saw that the traffic light finally turned green, and he is on his way.
    About  13 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  just passed a housing development and wonders if the rumor is true that one of the famous Osmond family members live in there?
    About  12 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  had to swerve to miss somebody’s bag that was laying in the middle of the right lane, before the freeway onramp.
    About  11 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  thinks there are too many commercials on the radio.
    About  9 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  is almost at work now.
    About  5 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  thinks the talk-show host guy on the radio had a good point.
    About  4 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan… arrived at work, and decided to go look at his facebook page.
    About  1 minutes ago * Updated via facebook esp.

    Ryan…  wonders why his friends list is much shorter than when he checked it an hour ago?
    A few seconds ago


  6. For with God nothing shall be impossible.

    April 9, 2009 by Ryan

    The moral of today’s lesson could be: Don’t talk back to the angel.

    The lessons learned come from the New Testament; The Book of Luke; Chapter 1; Verses 5-22 and 59-80.

    The person who learned this lesson was Zacharias. He and his wife Elisabeth were of the lineage of Aaron. Verse 6 describes them as righteous and obedient people. This righteous couple had never bore children. They were getting along in years now, and had resolved themselves that they would never have children together in this life, though it was still the greatest desire and hope in their hearts.

    Zacharias was of the lineage that he held the rights to the Aaronic or Levitical priesthood authority, and was himself a priest. Perhaps it would be appropriate to pause and explain this significance.

    In the history of Israel, those who were male descendants of Levi could have this authority, and only firstborn sons of Aaron could be the high priest, or president of the priests. The priests could offer sacrifices for the people, burn incense on the altar, and teach the law, whereas the other Levites were employed in more menial tasks, such as the housekeeping of the tabernacle, keeping oil in the lamps, transporting the Ark of the Covenant, taking down and setting up the tabernacle when moving, and related tasks. As the family of Levi grew, King David later organized the Levites into twenty-four courses, and each took turns performing the duties at the temple. After the scattering and captivity of Israel, only four courses remained. By the time of our story in Luke, there were perhaps 1400 men in each course.

    I bring that up to emphasize that with each course taking turns, and within each course the men taking turns at performing duties, it was a once-or-twice-in-a-lifetime kind of event to be serving in the temple in the official priesthood capacity. Something men would train and prepare and look forward to all their lives. Even more rare was the opportunity to serve as the high priest who would get to step inside the temple to burn incense. This priest would be only steps away, separated by the veil of the temple, from the most sacred “holy of holies” room where the most sacred objects of the religion, including the Ark of the Covenant, was kept. It was the room, behind that curtain, that Jehovah Himself would return to, if He choose to appear. This place called the temple was the most sacred, holy, revered place of worship in all of Judea.

    And this day, it was Zacharias’ turn to go in and burn the incense.

    Zacharias did not just walk in without preparation. Men who were to go inside went through a period of purification and preparation for the event.

    He must have been excited. Perhaps he was also anxious or nervous. His mind certainly swirled, taking in the magnitude of the experience and savoring every moment of the opportunity. The people would be waiting outside, praying until they saw the smoke rise out, and then the priest would exit, and dismiss the multitude.

    That was how it was supposed to go.

    But this time, something different happened. Zacharias went inside and began his duties. When in this holiest of places, an angel appeared.

    He was troubled. He was certainly not expecting anyone else to be in this room with him. Many thoughts might have occurred, including perhaps thinking this was another mortal man. If so, who was he, and how did he get inside? Or perhaps, He thought that it may be Jehovah coming to His temple? No matter how much purification and preparation a mortal man might have done, there would be no preparation for that experience!

    The angel told him to “Fear not, Zacharias.” The angel knew his name, and called him personally. That must have assured Zacharias. He continued, “Thy prayer is heard; and thy wife Elisabeth shall bear thee a son, and thou shalt call his name John. And thou shalt have joy and gladness; and many shall rejoice at his birth.”

    The angelic messenger proceeded to tell him about his child. John would be an Elias, a title meaning a preparer or forerunner for another. He gave prophetic instructions and introduction for this unborn son to the man would be his father.

    An overwhelmed Zacharias reacted by asking “Whereby shall I know this?” or in other words, “How do I know that you are telling me the truth?” Perhaps in modern language he might have asked, “Am I on Candid Camera?”

    Now I can’t fault poor Zacharias for not believing. This news seemed impossible to him; he and his wife had long ago given up hope of having a child. Zacharias was still a mortal man, and doubt entered his heart the same way it sometimes comes into yours and mine. Doubt about his deepest regrets and dreams would be no stretch of the imagination.

    Unfortunately, it was in the one place on the Earth where there should be no doubt and no fear. It was inside of the temple, and clearly this was an angel of the Lord. There should have been no room for disbelief in this environment.

    So Zacharias was reproved with sharpness by the angel. The angel reminded him that he came from the presence of God to deliver this message, and if Zacharias didn’t appreciate that, then for a sign that this was all on the up and up, Zacharias would be struck dumb. He would not speak. This curse would last until the baby arrives.

    It was a curse for his unbelief, but mercifully there was an end pronounced to the suffering. God is pretty good about not punishing a person any more harshly than they deserve. And so He saw fit, through his angel, to extend an end to the punishment.

    All the while the people waited outside, wondering what was taking so long.

    Zacharias came out, and tried to dismiss them, but could not speak. With gestures, he beckoned them to be dismissed.

    Just like the angel said, at the eighth day after the birth, at the circumcision and naming of the child, Zacharias wrote the name, and the dumbness was lifted. Then Zacharias followed the event with a lengthily explanation and prophecy, expressing great faith and hope in the Lord God of Israel. Zacharias learned his lesson, and everything turned out alright. Though he was once caught up in his own thoughts, and couldn’t see past his own mortal abilities to understand and comprehend the mysteries and miracles of God, he had learned his lesson now!

    So should I learn my lesson from Zacharias. Don’t doubt the power and ability of God. Seek wisdom from Him, and accept it and embrace it with faith when it comes. Don’t get caught up in your own limitations, fears, and beliefs that you would deny the power of God to work miracles in your own life.

    That’s what I learned today from Zacharias.


  7. Overlooking the Obvious?

    April 9, 2009 by Ryan

    As longtime friends and readers surely recognize, I have my “finger on the pulse” on the banking and financial worlds. With my years of astute wisdom and observations, I believe that I may have isolated a major problem for the banks right now, which are suffering through a tough time. As a public service, I will now share it with everyone here, in an effort to improve the world and right the economic slides that the markets have been seeing.

    I was recently listening to a radio commercial of a financial institution offering an “18-month, no-interest loan.” It instantly occurred to me that this was the root of the entire problem. If a bank takes no interest in their products, why should they expect their customers to do so?

    Now that this crisis is resolved, please enjoy a funny video…


  8. A problem for the Mayo Clinic to research?

    April 1, 2009 by Ryan

    All I have in the house is “Lite Mayo.” Apparently, in order to promote additional savings, they folks at the mayonnaise company dropped letters from the name too. Anyway, I don’t have any regular mayonnaise today. So I’ll have to make due with the “Lite” variety.

    Now, here is a particularly disturbing discovery. This “lite” kind contains 55% less fat than regular mayonnaise. This stuff only has 5 grams, whereas the regular has 11 grams per serving.

    If one tablespoon of mayonnaise normally provides me 11 grams of fat, but this stuff only has 5 grams of fat, that means that I have to use – one point five times 1, carry the decimal point – 1.55 table spoons of the “lite” kind in order to get the same amount of fat as the regular.

    Now then, do you know how hard it is to measure 1.55 tbls? Fortunately, there are conversion tools online to help me figure out how to measure those. One US tablespoon is equal to three US teaspoons. So if I use one tablespoon, plus one teaspoon, I get 1.33 tablespoons. That leaves .22 to try to measure. 1/5 teaspoon = 1 milliliter, and .33 table spoons would convert to .066 tablespoons then .22 divided by .066 comes out to 3 more 1/5 teaspoon sizes. Point is, my sandwhich for lunch took me 10 extra minutes to make and now tastes over half as much like imitation mayonnaise than it did before, when I had to slather it with a full tablespoon serving size (and then it tasted pretty much like a full teaspoon of real mayonnaise).

    What were they thinking when they created this product anyway?