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October, 2008

  1. The Scary Topic

    October 28, 2008 by Ryan

    Fall is in the air. With global warming and the later daylight-savings time, it doesn’t feel like it. But the people in charge tell me that fall is indeed in the air.

    And coming around the corner is that very scary season. You know, the one where we all hide behind a curtain and tremble in fear. We just hope that the rascals will leave us alone.

    They just come around and ask us for more, more, more! Oh, they all say the sweet sounding phrase, but we really know they don’t mean it. Although, just in case they will leave a trick on us, we give in and give to them anyway. We’re all pretty certain we won’t get anything back in return for our compliance, but we hope that at least they will leave us alone.

    It never works. They always come back.

    They come to haunt you. To scare you. To insist that you do as they bid, while hoping you won’t notice that things never really change.

    They dress up in nice closes, but their intentions are still selfish.

    Some years, they don’t cause much trouble. They make their appearance and are on their way. But every few years, you know that they are going to be louder and more obnoxious than normal. Seems to be a cycle. And often they come in groups.

    And this year, they are back again in full force.

    The good news is that there is only a week until Election Day. And then things might settle down.


  2. Southern Hospitality

    October 25, 2008 by Ryan

    Hey, how are ya’ll do’in?

    It is a downright pleasure to visit with you today. I’m speaking from Greenville, South Carolina.

    My work has given me an opportunity to visit down south. The right friendly folks in South Carolina have welcomed me here, from my first steps off the airplane they have been gracious.

    I’m amazed and overwhelmed by the hospitality they’ve shown me. Yes sir, I’d like to bottle up that kindness and take it back with me. And I reckon that, if I asked, the folks would help me pack that up and carry the bottle out to my car.

    The restaurant, the grocery store, and my co-workers out here – great people. I ain’t seen none kinder. Yes ma’am, I right done enjoyed myself.

    And oh, boy! Do they ever know how to cook! Woo-ee!

    So this quick note, just to let ya’ll know I’ve been think’in of ya and wish you were all here.

  3. Those Flashing Red Lights

    October 14, 2008 by Ryan

    The law has caught up with me. My jig is up. I have a record now.

    All these years, I’ve worked to keep my public reputation looking good.

    Appearances are deceiving.

    One day, you live high on the hog. Then with one misstep, you find you’re that much closer to facing a grand jury.

    Of course, I’ll take the fifth, and hope my attorney can get me off. Or at least reduce the charges.

    But in case I am hauled off to the hoosgow, I hope someone will carry on the blog in my absence. My password is the same as the bank’s safe combo.

    Humpty Dumpty’s egg shell world came crashing down when I swerved to miss the truck.

    The truck was backing out of a driveway, crossing one lane of traffic and reversing toward my lane.

    It was dark (us evil dooers like the cover of darkness, you know). And since I didn’t want the truck to damage my car (with all the goods inside), I swerved a little to the right to avoid him hitting me. I didn’t know his intentions, see?

    It turned out that he was stopping in the center lane, and I would have been fine. So I moved back into my lane as I continued on.

    It turned out I had a cop tailing me.

    The lights turned on in my rear view mirror. I thought they’d just want to pass me, off to catch some real punk who was shoplifting spray paint down at the Wal-Mart. But as I signaled, moved to the right lane, and slowed down, the lights followed me to the right lane, and stopped behind me.

    The jig was up. The long arm of the law had my number.

    I rolled down my window, and put my hands at 11:00 o’clock and 1:00 o’clock. I sweat bullets as I waited for my fate.

    The police lady appeared, shining her flashlight in to blind me as the interrogation began.

    “Did you know you have a tail-light out?”

    “Uh, no. No, I didn’t!”

    “Yeah, your driver’s side tail light is out.”

    “Oh, ok” I said, breathing a huge sigh of relief.

    She shined her light around the car, looking for some other offense. But I had the goods safely hidden, and she didn’t spot them.

    She asked for my license, and I handed it over. She ran my number, and my plates, and found that my alias was clean.

    And I was on my way with a warning.

    Two different times later, I checked out that taillight. It works just fine.

    The cops were looking for an excuse to try to get the goods on me.

    But for now, I’ve outsmarted ’em.

    Justice will have to wait until another day.

    Like the day they read this blog.

    And then the gig is up again.

  4. Digital TV Conversion

    October 11, 2008 by Ryan

    A public service announcement for Digital TV…

    (Please be aware that any videos advertised at the end of the public service announcement are provided by youtube, and not necessarily endorsed by us!)

  5. The Unsettling Settlers

    October 8, 2008 by Nate and Michelle

    A couple years ago, we were hanging out with some of our friends when we were introduced to a game called “Settlers” (or “Settlers of Catan”).  Needless to say, we got hooked.  After holding out for a while, we reluctantly forked out the $40 for the game.  All was well.  We played it with friends, got them hooked, and life was good.  Then we found out that the game gets more interesting if you get one of the additions, such as “Cities and Knights,” “Seafarers,” or the all-time great “Settlers of Zarahemla.”  For my birthday, I decided to frivolously spend another $40 for “Seafarers”.  It definitely makes the game even more interesting and gives you a lot more room to play.  The problem, though, is that we bought the original game before July of 2007, so it did not come with border pieces.  While we were able to improvise, it looked awful and messy, so we researched and found that for another $8 we could get an “adapter kit” that would give us border pieces and some other useful bits.  Now life is great. 

    Except for the unsettling part about Settlers.

    If you’re like me, you would have been doing the math on how much it all cost.  Figuring tax and everything, it costs about a Benjamin Franklin when all is said and done.  So what is the game made of?  Does it come gold plated?  Is it on a nice velvet table like the ones available with super-deluxe versions of Monopoly?  What is the justification? 

    The justification is simple.  The game is all cardboard and tiny pieces of wood, but it’s made in Germany.  With the U.S. dollar declining in value lately, that’s what it costs to buy stuff from a European country.  Not that I’m saying the game isn’t worth it, we just need to play it a lot to get our money’s worth.  Maybe we could start charging our friends to play it…  I could handle that.  Getting paid to play Settlers would be awesome.  Anyone want to play me for $1?  It’s much better than a double cheeseburger.